We all want pleasure, right? The degree of pleasure you enjoy in your life is not just a matter of how much you acquire, it’s a state of being. The more present, receptive and open you are in your body, mind and being, the more genuine enjoyment and gratitude you can derive from the simplicity of daily life. “I woke up, jumped in the shower, and for the first time in 50 years I really felt the water caressing my body, and it was truly pleasurable” shares Martin, the day after a Tantra workshop.
It doesn’t stop there. How would it be to allow the heights and depths of sexual pleasure to be higher and deeper still – without having to learn any new skills? As you make love, or as you are touched or pleasured by your partner, allow yourself to relax deeply. Take natural deep breaths, lightly imagining that you are breathing air into your sexual organs, all the way up to the crown of your head, and releasing from crown to genitals on the exhale. Allow all the tension in your stomach, thighs and genitals to release as you exhale. There is nothing to chase, or get. As you relax more fully, you will notice tingling or rippling sensations in your body. Welcome these.
Become aware of your thoughts. Notice how your thinking affects your experience. Is your mind elsewhere? Shopping list? Or are you wondering when your partner is going to stop, get bored, get it wrong or notice your unshaven bikini line? Whenever you notice one of these limiting thoughts, as you continue to make love or receive caresses, receive your partner’s gaze and speak this thought out loud to them. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions this evokes. Then return your attention purely to the touch, to this moment, without dwelling further on this thought.
“I’m frightened if I let go more, I’ll become emotional, and you might get worried and stop” Maria shares with her partner Steve, as he massages her. As they both smile in recognition of this statement, Maria’s eyes are moist with a mixture of vulnerability and relief. Steve continues with his sensual adoration, and Maria’s defenses melt away. She laughs and moans with delight.